Fortunate….Fehu…lucky in everything. Love, health, charisma, attraction and the ability to always “get by”. It is mobile wealth, since our ancestors carried their most important posessions with them and didn’t accumulate more than they could carry. Today is Christmas. This Christmas, we don’t have many presents but we have more than we usually do. That’s what Christmas started as. Not a consumer bachanalia of abandoned spending and accumulating. I started this day with the intention of making my 17 year old daughter a rune rock for health. She has been suffering with undiagnosed stomach issues. Anyway, I thought of Fortunate Cat(my new logo) which I was fortunate wasn’t already taken. Which caused me to look up the rune Fehu once again. I always am refreshing my memory on the runes since I go long periods in which I don’t look at them. Plus, refreshing my memory helps me discover deeper meanings in the runes. Such as I did this morning. A true Christmas gift. The gift of hidden knowledge. It’s movable wealth. Fehu is not only money, it’s great health. You can always take your health with you and it’s value is greater than mansions and jewelry. How could you enjoy your mansion and jewelry without good health? You couldn’t. Joy is included in mobile wealth as well as happiness, love, all of the feelings that make life worth living. Fehu gives. Fear takes everything away. What is there to fear? Loss. Loss of health. Loss of home. Loss of possessions. When speaking of the positive, I don’t enjoy the negative but that is the rune reversed. Loss. To lessen the fear of loss, I can and I do focus on my movable assets. My body doesn’t hurt. I am relatively healthy. My children are mostly healthy. Stomach problems are common these days. Once diagnosed, they can be alleviated. I have gotten everything that I ever wanted, unfortunately or fortunatelyb not when I thought that I wanted. I got them when I actually needed them. Fortune works that way. 

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This is a topic that I didn’t create. It was leftover somehow when I was creating this page. Just the title: Home. I decided to write a post on Home. Well, I could just as well write a novel on the one word. In fact, I am writing a novel about returning home. Returning to an imagined home. My novel is called “The Dream of the 4 Pillars: A Journey Home”. I’ve never had a proper home, a stable, comforting, beautiful place of peace with love surrounding. About 15 years ago, I had a dream of being sent on a journey. I’m not going to tell the whole novel here but I was given a journal with 4 drawings of 4 different, Egyptian pillars. Each of the 4 pillars had a very special interpretation. They had to be experienced, like a universe. The journal led the journey home but to get home, I needed to experience each of the pillars. I later associated the pillars to the 4 elements of fire, earth, water and air and to the Tarot 4 suits which, along with the major Arcana of the tarot can be thought of as “The Hero’s Journey “. The Hero’s Journey, in my opinion and after experiencing that dream and going on my own personal journey of life with awareness, is in fact a journey home.

My Familiar

About 7 years ago, my crazy ex husband (who undoubtedly thinks that I’m crazy due to my love for animals) told me something quite extraordinary. Now, I know it could have been drugs or alcohol or both speaking but when I asked again on another day, he said the same thing to me and that was this: Everywhere that I go, I have an “elemental” animal traveling with me. He described the animal as a small, blue animal that would run around me, ahead of me, behind me and ride on my shoulders and head with me. It was always with me. As for “crazy “people, I always consider that they can see what I cannot and so, I took comfort in the feeling of having a cheerful, constant companion. I envisioned the animal to be ferret like or squirrel like, frisky and affectionate. After he told me about my little invisible friend, things went from bad to worse in our relationship and then they got even worse than the worst. I’m not going to get into all of the events but I ended up with Cancer stage 4 uterine and my husband had abandoned me and our 2 teenage daughters. We lived in 2 travel trailers on a property in which the agreement had been for him to do monthly maintenance in exchange for us living there. So, we had to move. I was always wondering;”What’s the point in having an invisible little blue friend with me, if the friend couldn’t help me?!” Well, I went through many challenges and somehow developed a new life. I didn’t think much about my “familiar”. Two years ago, my cat named Blair gave me a present. This present was a baby ground squirrel, mostly unharmed. Even though she was healthy, I had to bring her into our home because her nest had been destroyed and her family scattered. I would have turned her over to an animal sanctuary that rehabilitates ground squirrels for the wild. Unfortunately, they don’t exist. They execute rescued ground squirrels. I chose to keep the squirrel. My daughter named her Frederick. I liked the name because I always loved the story of Frederick the mouse. Neither one of us thought that the squirrel was a girl. She’s now, Frederick the girl squirrel. Soon after I was gifted Frederick, I found out that I had stage 4 Cancer again! This time around, I had my “familiar “ in physical form since she turned out to be exactly like my imagination had envisioned my little blue friend (except she wasn’t blue and she wasn’t invisible). This time around, my “familiar “ helped me. My daughters were grown, ages 19 and 21. My squirrel desperately needed me to live. I wasn’t afraid of her. I let her out of her cage, regularly. I talked to her and played with her. It’s not my daughters fault but they couldn’t fulfill the needs of such a busy pet. Frederick is almost 2 now. She’s physical. She’s my best friend. She’s taught me so much about tenacity and playfulness. I am cancer free again. I don’t know how long a squirrel in captivity can live. Somehow, I do know that when she leaves this mortal place, she will return to my shoulder and be blue again and free to run around.

The Philosophy of the 4 Pillars of Destiny

This adventure of life has absolutely no rules. No reason for fear and anxiety. Believing will make it so, fortunately and unfortunately. The wheel of life is always spinning because we choose it to do so. Be grateful. Not for a reward in this life or alternate lives. Be grateful to have the opportunity to learn, do, experience, suffer also. I’m not original. I haven’t made anything up or created a new religion or philosophy. It’s the Matrix. Life is the illusion. We are the dream. When you wake up in the dream, you can fly.

The 4 Pillars of Destiny Dream

Dreams are fascinating, illuminating, sometimes disturbing and more rarely, life transforming. I’ve had dreams of events that later came true.

The one true dream that redefined the meaning of life for me was the dream that I entitled The Dream of the 4 Pillars. This dream came to me about 20 years ago. It was like the most satisfying movie experience since I was the main character and I experienced everything first hand. The dream, like life was layered with meaning in metaphor. This dream came to me like an oasis in a desert. My life was parched of hope. I was trapped by fate or karma or, more likely, PTSD.
The dream started with a perfect cinematic beginning…

A lone woman, in her early 40’s, petite, pretty young looking with golden brown hair and beautiful, haunting tri color eyes of turquoise, green and with gold around the pupils, walks through an entrance arbor of flowers. She tentatively, resolutely and defeatedly walks along the short, gravel garden path to the portal of a closed villa restaurant. We have a feeling of ancient ancestry. A feeling of homecoming marred by misfortune and failure….(to be continued)